The Maiden’s Reward
It’s amazing how just one small step often stands between freedom and us. Everything around the maiden had failed and in utter helplessness and desperation, she throws herself on God. Many times it seems it takes some great need, some desperation point, before we are set free from our pride and self-sufficiency. As one man has said, “We will never be moved to change until our yawn becomes a scream.” As long as we are able to maintain the outer wall and cover our failures, hide our deepest feelings, and live in secret through all of God‘s pruning, we will remain within the rigid limits of our narrow selves.
The maiden was running all over trying to find her lover and finally, after she let go of all her pre-conceived ideas of his working and finally became still and left the means of blessing to him, did she find him. “Scarcely had I passed them when I found the One my heart loves” (Song 3:4).
To come out of our self, is to be so broken that we lose all thought of self-interest, self-complacency, self-glory, self-appropriation. To rise and seek him, is the pouring out at his feet the cry of our heart, the furnace of intense desire being awaken by the Holy Spirit; the vacuum ready for God to fill.
To find him, simply means our earnest seeking has given place to quiet resting on the Word of the Lord, “(You) are in the clefts of the Rock,” and turning our eyes toward him as the Living One.
In an outburst of joy the maiden said that she “found him,” and added, “I held him and would not let him go” (Song 3:4).
Through this time of discipline and testing, the Lord never allowed her to experience more than she was able to endure. He allowed her to find him and even allowed himself to be led by her. “I held him and would not let him go until I had brought him to my mother’s house, to the room of the one who conceived me” (Song 3:4). The mother’s house represents grace and the room indicates the love of God. God used the principle of grace and his love to bring her out. But because she can‘t discern the difference between what is of the Spirit and of the soul, he meets her at that level. She soulishly clings to him. She still has to learn to rely on the Word of God alone out of a heart of complete trust.
As she goes on to know him, she will make a very important discovery; He will never veil his presence from her whenever she loses all thought of herself.
It is not for her to cling to him. To grasp is to lose in the things of God. He will stay only if we will trust ourselves to him, and learn to let him go as he wills. He is like Aslan in the Narnian Chronicles from C. S. Lewis; “He’ll be coming and going . . . One day you’ll see him and another you won’t. He doesn‘t like being tied down . . . Only you mustn’t press him. He’s wild, you know. Not like a tame lion.” We are not to watch and rest on his manifestations, but to trust him and rely on his Word alone.
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